The Most Humiliating Interview I Ever Had – And 4 Lessons I Learnt on Interview Preparation
Performing well in an interview requires preparation. If you believe that you do not need to prepare for interviews because you can think on your toes and speak off the cuff, you are making a big mistake.
As long as you do not run your own business, chances are you need to get a job. And as long as you need to get a job, interviews are part and parcel of life.
Yet, I made the serious mistake of taking my interview preparation I made when I went for the first serious interview in my life more than 15 years ago.
The result was the most humiliating situation I ever found myself in. Til this day, I shudder to recall what happened back then and my pride still hurts.
Looking back now, this experience taught me very valuable lessons. By learning from this mistake, I have improved on my interview preparations. Since then, I have aced every single interview that I went to.
Curious to know more? Read on.
Interviewing for a Scholarship
Back in 2002, I was a young 20 year old still serving the Army. In Singapore, all 18 year old males are conscripted to join the Singapore Armed Forces to serve for 2 years.
The next phase in my life after serving my country was to go on to University to further my studies.
I was going for an interview to secure a scholarship given out by an MNC. If successful, they would have sponsored my tuition fees for my university education overseas or locally.
Upon completion of my studies, I would also be guaranteed a job with them as I would need to fulfill a bond of 4 years.
Why I thought I needed no Interview Preparation
I had an impressive resume then ( that was how I got shortlisted to begin with).
In my secondary school days I was an accomplished suona player and the Chairman of the Chinese Orchestra (leadership role).
In my Junior College days, I was active in the Outdoor Activities Club and also held leadership roles.
To my knowledge, leadership roles and participation in activities outside of academic pursuits were great advantages in securing scholarships.
When I moved on to the Army, I made it into the Singapore Armed Forces Officer Corp and attained the rank of Lieutenant.
As part of my training, I went through the Jungle Confidence Course in Brunei and was the Best Trainee for my Cohort.
Again, a display of leadership potential and mental strength to survive the grueling training in Brunei.
To top it off, I was a straight A Student with immaculate academic results.
Also, I thought that I was a good speaker with quick reaction. I was confident that I could respond to any question asked by the interviewer off the cuff.
So, for my interview preparation, all I did was to read the company’s website for about 15 minutes on the internet to get to know more about the company.
Big mistake.
Pre-Interview Jitters
On that fateful day, I traveled to the company and arrived at the office 15 mins before my scheduled timing.
I was asked to wait outside the interview room and sitting beside me was another young man around my age.
Seeing how he was all dressed up with a suit and tie, it was obvious that he was here for the same interview as I was.
“Ah, my competitor. How many openings are there for this scholarship?” I wondered to myself.
At this moment the interview room door opened and I could hear some laughter and final exchanges between the candidate leaving the room.
“All right, sure, thanks a lot for saying that.”
Some laughter heard coming from the room.
” See you guys, have a nice day!”
And the candidate left with a broad smile on his face.
“The interview definitely went well for that last guy. Can I impress the interviewers as much as he did? ” I thought to myself.
The young man beside me was called and he entered the interview room.It was then that I started to get a little nervous. My heart beat went up and I felt my mouth going dry. I knew I was up next.
My Most Humiliating Interview Experience – How Everything Went Wrong
After 20 mins, the interview room door opened and the young man in front of me left. Our eyes met each other briefly and I could tell that it was a pleasant experience for him as well.
My name was called and it was my turn to enter the interview room.
I was greeted by a panel of four interviewers. They looked friendly as all of them looked up at me and smiled and slightly nodded their heads to acknowledge my entrance.
After I was asked to take my seat, the first to speak was a man who was the oldest in the group. He looked to be about 50 years old and I assumed that he was the highest ranking of the group.
I shall call him Elder from here onwards.
“Alright, Jax. Can you tell us more about yourself?” Elder began.
Caught by Surprise by the Most Common Interview Question
Where do I even begin? There was so much to talk about. In my interview preparation I had not even anticipated this basic question.
Many things raced through my mind in that split second.
Should I start from the most recent or should I start from the beginning?
Which aspects of my life should I share to impress the interviewers?
The problem with this seemingly simple question is that it can throw you off guard if you are not prepared.
It takes some preparation to summarize your life into an impressive opening statement that is well organized.
After freezing for three seconds, I started to talk about whatever came to my mind.
“Hi every one. My name is Jax…… Currently, I am serving the army… I am an instructor in the Army…. I train Officer Cadets to become Officers… In my spare time I love to run…”
As I spoke, I noticed that my mouth was very dry as I was very nervous prior to the interview. Getting off on a bad start sucked me into a vicious cycle.
Suddenly, my mind went blank.
And then I just froze. The panel of four continued to look at me urging me to go on. After an awkward five seconds they seemed to realise that that was all I had to say.
At this point I noticed that a lady in her forties sitting to the left of Elder was frowning. Henceforth she shall be known as The Frowning Observer.
The Frowning Observer
“So what are the distances you usually run?” A younger man in his thirties seated on the right of Elder was the next to speak. I shall call him Nice Guy.
“Oh usually 5-10km on alternate days.” I gave another short answer. At this point I was still recovering from the shock of not performing well on the first question.
I took another peek at The Frowning Observer. She was still frowning and writing something down on her paper.
Not good. This is not good.
Giving Generic Answers that Fail to Impress in an Interview
“So what brings you here today? Why have you applied for this scholarship?” Elder asked, bringing us back on track.
“I have applied for this scholarship because I would like to have an opportunity to study overseas for my university education. I see it as a chance to challenge myself and gain exposure.”
Even I myself was not impressed with my generic answer.
“So have you already applied for any universities overseas?” Elder continued.
“Yes, I have applied and was accepted to a University in the UK.” I replied.
This was a redeeming point for me I thought. Having secured a place in an overseas University was an advantage.
From the experiences of my tutors and seniors in school, it tells the interviewers that you have already taken actions to get you where you wanted to go. All you lacked was a scholarship.
“Why the UK and not some other countries?” Elder asked.
Poor Choice of Words
“Well for this, I have to tell the truth. I have not really considered why.”
The moment these words left my mouth, I knew what was coming. Even I myself was shocked at how stupid I made myself appear.
Why did I have to add the phrase “to tell the truth”?
“To tell the truth? You mean you have been lying all along?” Elder quipped.
Lousy reaction to opportunities because I have not considered my options
At this point, I knew that the interview was over. I had lost the respect of Elder. The Frowning Observer looked like she just heard the silliest thing ever in her life.
“Jax, I see that you have Excellent Grades in the Chinese Language. Would you consider not going to the UK? If we were to send you to China instead, what do you think?” Nice Guy came to my rescue.
“For me I would prefer to still go to the UK. Having been brought up in Singapore and living with my family who are Chinese Speaking, I would want to go to the UK to put myself out of my comfort zone.”
In actual fact, I made the above statement because the thought of going to China never crossed my mind. Having no time to react, I stuck to my original plans.
“No, the way the Chinese people do things are very different from the Chinese people in Singapore. The UK’s education system is also very similar to Singapore’s. So, if you truly want to get out of your comfort zone, going to China instead of the UK is the correct choice.” Elder responded.
I had failed to grab the opportunity to turn the situation around. Nice Guy obviously tried to pick up some of my strengths and threw out a question to guide me. Yet I was too dumb to use this to my advantage.
The company had operations all over the world, including China. They probably needed some one who was bi-lingual and had the ability to communicate with the Chinese.
My strengths in the Chinese language could have given me a huge advantage over other candidates. Considering how I had failed spectacularly in the first few interview questions, I desperately needed to prove myself.
Rounding up the Embarrassing Interview
By now, the Frowning Observer had finished writing and was sitting back with her arms folded. I wished I could just stand up and leave.
“So in your hobbies column you wrote down reading as one of your hobbies. Can you tell us about a book you have read recently?” The youngest in the panel spoke. She was a lady in her late 20s.Young Lady is what I will call her.
I went through the motion and talked about a book on leadership written by John Maxwell. I quoted some ideas about how a leader should be comfortable in his position and not feel threatened by his subordinates’s good performance.
Young Lady smiled and nodded her head and had no further question. It was almost like an after thought. It was as if she had to ask something to close up the interview.
“Ok we have come to the end of the interview. Do you have any questions for us?” Elder concluded professionally.
“No, that will be all.” I forced myself to smile and the interview ended.
The entire interview process took less than 10 minutes. But it felt like an eternity.
Licking my Wounds from the Interview
Til this day, I cannot forget The Frowning Observer’s expression and how she must have thought I was an idiot. On top of that, Elder’s cold response when he corrected me on my thought process about going to the UK or China made me realize that I knew very little about the outside world.
For the next few days, what happened during the interview played repeatedly in my mind. My poor performance in the interview made me feel humiliated and defeated. Maybe, I was not as good as I thought I was.
Instead of wallowing in self-pity, I picked myself up and learnt the following lessons.
Important Lessons on Interview Preparation
Lesson 1: Be Prepared for Basic Interview Questions
In my humiliating interview experience, I was caught off guard because I had not even prepared for very simple and basic questions. Looking back, I think the interviewers must have felt that I lacked sincerity.
On top of that, opening questions usually serve as a gate way for further conversations. By giving very short answers, I did not give the interviewers sufficient material to work on.
So, do not underestimate a basic question such as “tell me more about yourself”. Your readiness to answer a very basic question tells the interviewer whether you are taking the interview seriously.
It is also how you make your first impression, demonstrate your eloquence and convey why you are here for the interview.
Lesson 2: Anticipate Questions and Know What You Want and What You Don’t
Study more about the position or company that you are applying for. Will you be asked to relocate? Are you going to work odd hours? What is the lowest pay you are willing to accept?
The question on whether I should study in the UK or China was a surprise and I learnt something from it.
I should know before hand what my boundaries were. For example, I should have a solid reason for choosing the UK. Or, I could have asked myself before hand if I was willing to study and live in China.
This should have been anticipated during my interview preparation, knowing that the company had branches in overseas.
Then, I would have been able to give a sensible answer when I turned down the option and yet retain my chances of succeeding at the interview. Or, I would have been well prepared to grab the opportunity when it was presented.
The last thing you want is to follow the flow and hesitantly agree to something you have not thought clearly about. Interviewers can sense your reluctance and this may jeopardise your chances, even if you had verbally agreed to what was proposed.
Lesson 3: Be Prepared to Substantiate whatever You Wrote In Your Resume
Towards the end of the interview, Young Lady picked up on my hobby and asked me to substantiate. I was not able to say something intelligent or impressive.
Since then, I have learnt to be prepared for questions regarding whatever was written in my resume.
As an interviewer myself now, I have come across so many resumes that are very generic descriptions on the candidates job role.
For example, a statement like this is very common in the resumes I receive.
“Responsible for improving quality, productivity and customer satisfaction.”
When asked to give examples on HOW the candidate had improved quality, productivity and customer satisfaction, the answers are usually generic.
It reveals that the candidate wrote these things in the resume just to fill up the page. These are normally warning signs that the candidate is sub par and does not really have the skills stated in the resume.
Lesson 4: Rehearse and Practice in front of a Mirror
An interview should make most people a little nervous, unless you are very comfortable with public speaking.
You should practice whatever answers you have prepared by reading them aloud.
The reason for that is to get used to hearing your own voice. If you only rehearse in your mind during your interview preparation, you would be shocked to find your voice trembling during the actual interview.
In Summary
To conclude, interview preparations are a must. It will help calm your nerves when you are able to answer questions smoothly. The added confidence from that will help you impress the interviewers.
After applying what I learnt from my humiliating experience, I never took interview preparations lightly again.
Since then, I have aced every single interview I have been to. Today, I consider the bad experience I had as the best lesson given to me.
Do you have any lessons to share on interview preparations? Have you ever had a bad interview that left you feeling embarrassed?
Share them in the comments section below.